So I was scanning the preview channel today and John "Skunkboy" Henson was blabbering about what's on TV tonight. He's not so bad, but where in the world did they find those inconturable, screeching bitches that do the reality TV talk? Those two make me want to jam corkscrews in my ears.
Anyway, Henson was talking about tonight's wacky episode of "According to Jim", in which Jim tries to help his friend meet women and one of them falls for Jim instead! Ha ha ha! THAT'S HILARIOUS! Man, today's sitcom writers just slay me with their originality. What I mean is I want to slay myself because I'm way funnier on my stupid blog that I write for FREE, for the enjoyment of myself and others, than the assjackers that are making boucoup bucks writing one-liners and "plots" for "According to Jim."
Which raises another burning question: does anyone actually watch "According to Jim"? Because I know quite a few people and none of them watch "According to Jim." Are there really people that clear out their Tuesday night schedules because they don't want to miss the latest episode of "According to Jim"? Has anyone ever standing at a water cooler asked, "Did you see 'According to Jim' last night? It was SO FUNNY!" Are there people that can't miss even one comedy-packed episode, a la "Desperate Housewives" or "Will & Grace", and programs "According to Jim" into their TiVo? Has anyone ever said "Tuesday night? No can do. That's 'According to Jim' night"? Does anyone really buy that someone that looks like Courtney Thorne-Smith would actually marry Jim Belushi, or that he would pick up more chicks than his friend, as on tonight's episode?
I looked it up on iMDb and this show is in its' fifth season! Can you believe that? Fucking "I Love Lucy" ran for five seasons! Now that's just wrong. Is this show so uproariously funny and popular that this is even possible? Perhaps I am wrong and I don't know it all. After all, when "Everybody Loves Raymond" went off the air, people reacted with more emotion than when the Pope died. When the "Raymond" cast appeared on stage together for the "last time" at the Emmys, the crowd was whipped into a frenzy, applauding maniacally, as if the comic geniuses of the century had just come out, and not RAY ROMANO AND PATRICIA HEATON.
Before I continue, I will say that I would be a hypocrite if I didn't mention that I, too, have been addicted to some pretty embarrassing shows. Back in the college days, if anyone called between 8–9 on Wednesday night, they would just get the phone slammed right down on them, dammit, because that's "90210" time! And I AM a bit ashamed to admit that I have seen every single episode of "Flavor of Love." Yes, that's the Flavor Flav dating show. It's on right now. Shut up.
Some futher research on iMDb revealed that the madness doesn't stop there. "Two and a Half Men" and "Hope & Faith" are now in their second seasons. "Yes Dear" and "Becker" both have six years each under their belts. Most horrifying of all, "The King of Queens" is currently in its' EIGHTH SEASON. "The Cosby Show," one of the most beloved comedies of all time, ran for eight years. Kevin James on par with The Cos? I just can't get behind that.
If you regularly watch "According to Jim," would you please explain to those of us who just don't get it what this show has that merits five seasons? Because I'm just mystified. It can't possibly be as good as "Flavor of Love."