Are you there, god? It's me, RockitQueen...

Dear god,

Bless mom and dad and sister and kitty and all my family and friends. Please bestow peace on the world and help all the sick, starving, hurt and destitute.

And, if you would, please send a special prayer to Sean Preston Spears Federline in the hopes that his little head feels better from that suspicious "tumble" he took out of his high chair and that he can forgive his mommy and daddy for waiting six whole days to take him to the hospital. I hope Sean Preston understands that his daddy is trying very hard to launch his career as The Great White Dope and simply can't bother with time-consuming hospital visits—he has lots and lots of rhyme-dropping to do. And mommy, well...one day SP will understand that mommy is just a big dum-dum. Like when she gives Sean half of her bag of Flamin' Hot Cheetos to gum 'cause it's easier than having her assistant open up two bags? That's not smart. Or when she pokes the soft spot on his head because she thinks she might be able to feel his brain thinking? That's not smart either. Some day he will understand, but in the meantime, please make sure that he has at least one good nanny that isn't afraid to break the confidentiality agreement to help him out.

Anyway, thanks for listening, god. I'm confident that you'll do the right thing.


1 comment:

Lola said...

I'm telling you, girl...it'll eventually be fine when he grows up and pulls a Menendez Brothers on them. I asked God to give him twice the brains of Mom and Dad put together, but that only brought him up to Paris Hilton, so...

Judy Blume would be turning in her grave if she were dead.